Day 11: Now That I'm a Mother

Now that I'm a mother, I am a lot of things that I was not before.  One of them being a cryer.  I have never been a cryer, but now my emotions are on overdrive.  But it's a good thing.  I feel things more deeply; I can connect with people on a deeper level than I could before.  This weekend is worship weekend at Grace Family Church, and tonight Josh and I had the privilege of praying with several people during the service.  One of them was a young lady who had just found out she was pregnant and her boyfriend split when she told him.  She was visibly shaken and admitted how scared she was about the whole situation.  As I was praying for her and thanking God for her unborn child and how he already had a plan for him, I got choked up and almost couldn't finish the prayer.  While I was praying for her child, I couldn't help but think of mine and tears of gratitude began to flow.

Day 10: Getting to Know Me (A Silly Quiz)

I couldn't think of anything to write today, and I love filling out surveys and questionnaires.  So, I thought it would be fun to post this little quiz, and hopefully, you'll enjoy reading it as much as I did filling it out!

1. Are you parents married or divorced?
Been married for almost 38 years :)

2. Are you a vegetarian?
Uh, no (no offense to those who are)

3.  Do you believe in Heaven?
Yes

4. Have you ever come close to dying?
Actually, when I was 14, I was at a basketball camp, and I had a freak fall on the court. I fractured my skull in 5 places and was in the hospital for days.

5.  What jewelry do you wear daily?
My wedding rings, Landry's birthstone ring, and earrings

6.  What is your favorite bible verse?
Jeremiah 29:11- For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.

7. Have you ever had surgery?
Yes, had my tonsils taken out, thyroid taken out, ear surgery

8. Do you color your hair?
Not on a regular basis.  I have before and I used to get highlights. It's all natural now.

9. Can you roll your tongue?
Yes, and I can also make a 'w' with it

10. Favorite book of the bible
James, and I also love Romans

11.  Future child's name?
Mabry Belle

12. If you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be?
I would love to go to Italy

13.  Favorite movie?
Life is Beautiful

14.  If you won the lottery, what would you do first?
Pay off my student loans

15. Hamburger or hot dog?
Hamburger all the way

16. Where did you eat last?
Ice cream at Baskin Robbins

17. When is the last time you cried?
Yesterday watching Army Wives (and now I'm being really transparent)

18.  Ocean or pool?
Pool

19. Window seat or aisle?
Window seat

20. Do you twirl spaghetti or cut it?
Twirl

21. Basketball or Football?
Football

22. Cake or ice cream?
Ice cream

23.  Coffee or Tea?
Coffee, but I have been trying to replace it every now and then with tea

24.  Favorite sports team?
University of Tennessee Volunteers

25. Current song?
Mirrors, Justin Timberlake

Day 9: A Season of Humbling

"Nothing prepares us for enormous blessing and impact like a season of humbling."  - Kelly Minter, Ruth: Love, Loss, and Legacy

I am currently going through a bible study on Ruth, and it's hitting me in ways I didn't foresee.  I like doing bible studies, especially those focused on books of the bible, because I love history, and I love to learn more about the culture and characters of the bible.  Every time I do a bible study, I am surprised more by the life transformation than the knowledge I acquire.  I shouldn't be surprised because doesn't the Bible say that it is the "breath of life" and has transforming power, yet I always receive more than I expect.  Isn't God great like that?

Anyway, in today's excerpt, I came across the quote above, and it hit home.  Again, I wasn't expecting it.  In fact, if I'm being honest I was planning on having a quick study this morning, read a little word, fill in all the blanks kind-of-a-day.  God, of course, had other plans.  The reason this quote stuck out to me is because I am in the middle of a humbling season myself.  In fact, I feel that it has been more of an era than a season.  Every few months, I get excited and feel like something big is on the horizon, and God continues to humble me in different areas of my life.  Now, don't feel sorry for me.  I have a great life and have been extremely blessed, but I know God has more for me, and in my impatient, selfish nature, I want to have it right now.  I can feel God using different situations and people to shape and mold me and my character, but sometimes, I just want to say, "Ok, God. I'm all done now (or ah duh as Landry says).  You can give me that big blessing you've got waiting for me."

Kelly Minter goes on to say that the Lord uses situations to humble us because he wants the posture of our heart to be fully surrendered to him.   In my impatient, selfish nature, my heart is not fully surrendered.  God wants us to be focused fully on Him and His kingdom and not our own, always thinking about how we can be blessed or live a better life.  The blessings he promises us are not rewards for enduring a hardship or season of humbling.  He blesses us because he loves us, and his ultimate blessing is using us to further His kingdom.  That's where the season of humbling becomes necessary.  So instead of sitting around waiting for that promised blessing to come, I will choose to be thankful for this season and the lessons I'm learning and the character that is being built in me and will take joy in the fact that when the blessings come, my heart will be in the posture to give God all the thanks and not take the credit for myself.

Day 8: It Looks Pretty Clean to Me!

I despise cleaning, and not because I don't want to put in the work.  Well, I don't love that, but I don't mind working to get a desired result.  The reason I dislike cleaning is that I'm no good at it.  I put in the work and don't get my desired result, so most time I don't put in the work.  I'll wipe anything and everything down with a Clorox wipe and think, 'that looks pretty clean to me.'  Just don't look too close at anything or anywhere you're not supposed to be looking anyway, like baseboards or the microwave or the oven. Ha!  Who cleans their oven anyway?  I keep meaning to use the self-clean button on the oven.  I'll add that onto next week's to-do list.

Even though I hate to clean, I feel even worse when I don't do it because I know I'm supposed to.  The task of cleaning hangs over my head as a constant reminder, and each day, I ignore it, I feel worse about myself as a human being.  Now, why do we as women do that?  I didn't clean for a week, and now somehow I'm unworthy of love.  Don't listen to that voice.  That's just THAT DEVIL (for real) attacking your thought life.  But anyway, I digress.  As I was gearing up myself for a morning of cleaning, I thought about the many times I have put off other things in my life that I should be doing.  I've done the quick fix thing and hoped nobody noticed.  But if you looked real close and in the places I tried to let nobody see, you would have seen the hurt and the insecurities and the sin.  But because I looked pretty clean, not many people did notice, and because my flaws weren't outwardly visible, I didn't work on them.  When I finally did get to the point of facing those things, it wasn't just a weekly touch-up they needed, it was a deep clean.

I clean my house, even though I would rather be reliving the 3 years of law school, because I don't want it to get to the point where it is an unhealthy and unsafe place to live.  The same principle holds true in other areas of my life.  Although it is sometimes painful to go in and clean those parts of your life nobody sees, it is worth it, and isn't it a good feeling when you know you have done the work and not just tried to make it look like you have?   I have decided that I'd like to really be clean, instead of just look pretty clean!

Day 7: Rest

And on the seventh day, God rested and so will I.  But I will share with you a wonderful blog post written by a dear friend of mine.  Enjoy!

Day 6: 10 Years

It's crazy that Josh and I started dating 10 years ago today!  We met at a christian sports camp at Campbellsville University where he was the camp pastor and I was a chaperone.  I was 19 and he was 21.  He said he knew the day he met me that he was going to marry me and that it took him 2 years to convince me.  After meeting and getting to know each other that week of camp, we exchanged numbers and talked on the phone almost everyday that summer.  He had plans to go to Southwestern seminary after camp but changed his course to move to Birmingham, AL, where I was attending college and got a part-time job as a middle school minister.  We dated until I finished college and got married 3 weeks after I graduated. We began our marriage in Savannah, GA, then moved to Lexington, KY, and have finally settled in Tampa, FL.  In the 10 years we've been together, we've known better or worse, richer or poorer, and in sickness and health.  He is my other half, and I can't imagine spending life with anybody else.

Day 5: Momma's Boy

My mother posted this on Facebook the other day for me, and I love it.  I'll have to say that these last few days though I have been a little sad because as of now, my little boy is not a momma's boy.  He loves his daddy and cries when he leaves and flaps his arms when he sees him and reaches for him when he's in my arms.  Of course, I want him to love his daddy and do all those things for him. I just want him to do that for me too.  But before I could throw my little pity party and be jealous of my husband, I was reminded tonight that yes, I am Landry's momma and I did give him his first kiss and he is my whole world.  While I was rocking him and giving him his bedtime bottle, he grabbed my hand and held on to it tightly.  In that moment, I realized how silly it was for me to be upset.  He's 10 months old, and so what that he favors his daddy right now, he knows who his momma is and loves me too.